“No” Will Set You Free

“No” is a simple word, but often the hardest to say.  What makes us incapable of saying “no” to people and situations?  Take a moment and think about your life…

Do you feel compelled to say “yes”, even when you need to say “no”?

It is commonplace for women to take care of everyone but themselves, leaving a void in their lives.  As we go down the path of doing for others, with little regard to the chaos it creates in our lives, we feel the strain.  There is pressure to live up to an impractical model, a superwomen type that can say “yes” to everyone, while still presenting herself “fresh as a daisy”, smiling that million dollar smile so big you wonder if her cheeks are going to cramp up.  Happy to do for others, all the time, day in and day out, until…there is nothing left.

While you do for others, who is doing for you?

We run out of time to take care of ourselves, losing the perspective that allows us to enforce limits with other people.  In the end, we are the ones that suffer, sacrificing our needs, ignoring our dreams; often straying from the path of our lives’ purpose.

In the fleeting moments we are able to say “no” to the demands of others, we often find ourselves plagued with guilt.  Like all emotions, guilt comes from within us, an accumulation of outdated standards, impossible expectations, and a need to please others.  We create guilt, allow it into our minds… and we are the ones that can release it from our lives.

We can start to eliminate guilt, when we prioritize our lives.  As we let go of the unnecessary interruptions, we then can choose to put our energy into the areas of our lives that really need it, instead of thinking that we are accountable for everyone else.  We are responsible for creating our own lives, as others are responsible for theirs.

When you bring into your consciousness that you are worthy of being a priority, then you can start putting your time and energy back where it belongs.  Think of how productive you would be, if you let “no” set you free from the shackles that are keeping you from working towards your true potential.

Until next time, enjoy the journey to self and everything in between.


Staying Positive in a Negative World

We have to come to the awareness of the infinite pairing of opposites keeping the universe going – birth and death, joy and sorrow, celebration and tragedy, and the list goes on. During our lifetime we will see tragedy, we will know sorrow, we will feel regret; it is not a question that negative things will come into our lives. The key is our ability to deal and rebound from the negativity going on in our lives, and in the world around us.

We do not have to let the disheartening news from the world shade our perceptions. When we focus on the positive, we can help ourselves from falling into the darkness. Be grateful for the all the positives in your life. Hold tight to what you are grateful for because it will help you get through the doom and gloom the world portrays.

Remember, for every grisly news story that we read, for every somber news clip we watch, there are hundreds of good things that happened in the world that did not make the news. There are people overcoming challenges, working together to change the world, and giving back. Unfortunately, the more horrific news “sells” better over the heartfelt news that we all could use. Spend some time to seek out those “good news” articles often buried deep in the newspaper.

Sometimes there are tragedies so great we cannot make any sense of them, it is difficult for even the most positive person to see the light through the fog of darkness. We have to let go of thinking everything in this world is for us to understand. There are things beyond our comprehension; in those times, we have to take comfort that there is more then just us at work in the universe. Open up and allow healing, allow faith and hope to remain strong. Time heals all; we just need to allow it to pass.

It is up to you, whether you focus on everything that is beautiful in the world or choose to let the despair affect your perceptions. It is your choice; do not allow anyone else to make it for you. You can be in charge of how you view the world. When you focus on the good in life, you will be able to steer your life in whatever direction you want.

After all, doesn’t everything come down to our perception in the end? While we may have little or no control on what goes on around us, we do have total control over our own thoughts, feelings, and actions.

Until next time, enjoy the journey to self and everything in between.